Cut!

Today I am wearing my movie-maker hat. Really, I should be sitting in a personalized director's chair with a nice beret atop my head, a clipboard in one hand and a megaphone sitting eagerly next to me.

As it is, I am on my couch, still in my pajamas with the phone at one side and middle daughter on the other. (don't worry: the children are being taken care of- they are on schedule and have consumed two meals today.)

I am attempting to create a lovely video for my Relief Society lesson on Sunday. All about families. And it's going pretty well, except for some reason i have this highlighted on top of every single screen I enter

1 C:\Users\Stephanie\Videos\RS Movie- Families

***********************************

In fact, it is on this very screen as I type. Right on the title line. I don't know. As you know, the husband is the computer savvy one in this family. I totally don't speak computer. For all I know I have just given myself a virus and as soon as I hit *publish post* it is going to spread throughout the universe and throw the international space station out of orbit. And it will be known as the RS Movie Virus. And it will probably affect your blog tomorrow, because I believe it is on a little time delay. Sorry in advance. I will loan out the husband to come and fix it for you. {Goodbye husband for the next couple of weeks while you are the I.T. guy to the world- all because of my little movie.}

******************

But, I will just stick with my ignorant state and continue with my little movie. I hope it turns out. Because I think it's going to be pretty good. You should come see it on Sunday. Plenty of seats still available. In fact, since it is Super Bowl XLIII Sunday, every seat could be available. Especially since our little team, the Cardinals, are playing in that game. Have you heard of them? I mean, before two weeks ago? But, I will be at church, teaching my lesson. And I may or may not be showing a little movie.

*********************

K, gotta get back to my movie. The take 5 is over.

*************

PS- i can tell the virus is starting because for some reason i can't get separate paragraphs for the whole last half of this post. so i just used these: *************i was not made to commune with technology...

Yikes!

No matter what anyone blogs today, I don't think they could top this. And be sure to watch the video!!!

Go over and offer this mom some happy thoughts today. I think she may need it.

just a quick note...

Dear Blog,

I have been avoiding you. I have nothing to say. Except maybe that I have a lot to do today. I think you can relate. You usually have a lot going on. I know you have a few visitors each day and you have to be a gracious host. I think you do a pretty great job. Wouldn't it be nice to have freshly baked cookies and milk everytime you have someone stop by? I know.

Anyway, Blog, you have been good to me. You listen to me. Without judgment. And I appreciate that. Especially when I start every other sentence with that little "and" word. Does it bug ya? I hope not. It's just who I am.

I'll let you in on a little secret. Not only do I start most sentences with "and", I really have to exercise discipline in not starting every post with "And so...". It's tough. And I know you understand. I just think "And so..." is such a great introduction. And when I start something with "And so..." it feels like I'm just picking up on our conversation where we left off.

I'll let you in on another secret. You know how we have the canine? I don't think I have ever told you her name. It's Sparkle. Isn't that an appropriate name for a puppy of little girls? I feel pretty secure in telling you her name. Whereas, with my children, it makes me nervous to put their names out there for all of creation to know what to call my children when they want to steal them away from me. Kinda paranoid? Yeah, maybe. But, I'm fond of the children and I'd like to keep them. Like forever.

And so, I'm off to do a little visiting teaching. And take back some library books that we never got around to reading. And take oldest daughter to piano lessons. And to work on my lesson for Sunday. And clean the pit of despair that is my house at this moment (I believe it is the most-neglected thing that lives here). Plus a bunch of other stuff. Like I said, I have a lot to do today.

Thanks for listening. Oldest daughter is learning the etiquette of letter writing. She has taught me all about it. And so, now I know how to end this letter. I have to say "Yours truly,". I think that's just what I'll say, because truly, I am yours. (and the husband's)


Yours truly,
Stephanie


PS- do you know what made me smile on little son's birthday? He said to me, "Mom, I am the three-est boy in the whole world!" Man, I love that kid.

the three-est

Today is little son's birthday. He is no longer the two-est. (wonder what that means? check here.) Definitely the three-est. And when you have someone who is the three-est in your house, these are some of the feelings you will have.

You will smile each time he asks you something and promptly replies with, "That is a good idea!"

You will love watching the three-est run intently down the hall to show you exactly how a super hero runs.

You will be exhausted when he wakes up in the middle of the night because his legs are aching, but you will cuddle and him and rub his legs and give him a little medicine to take the ache away. And you will pray that he will sleep peacefully the rest of the night.

You will want to hug him tightly when he performs a task, looks to you for approval and gives you a "thumbs up" with that little stubby thumb that three-ests are known to have.

You will find that your heart can belong to another boy besides your husband.

You will look forward to his next change of super hero status, wondering what he wants you to call him for the next 20 minutes until he changes his mind and becomes a different super hero.


You will laugh when you realize that "The Trash Can Guy" he has been referencing all day is actually none other than Oscar the Grouch. Silly mom.


You will think "this kid is tiring me out" about 400 times a day.


Your heart will melt everytime you put him down for a nap and his little puckered up voice-sound says, "Mom, will you lay down with me?"


You will want to drink in every moment with him, because one day he will be the four-est.

And you will thank your Heavenly Father for entrusting you to raise one of his beloved sons.

These are the things that matter to a mom:

food in her pantry
chocolate
sloppy kisses from her children
an extra 1/2 hour of sleep
clean bathrooms
peacefully sleeping babes
combed hair
a shower longer than 5 minutes, and a bath if she can get it
feeling pretty
appreciation
story time
tweezed eyebrows
love notes scribbled by the hand of her 6 year old
interpreting the requests of a silly 2 year old
bills paid
a vehicle in working condition
bedtime
a good book
a good blog
recognition
macaroni necklaces
school picture ornaments
time to herself
good deodorant
a willing babysitter
a little bit of spending money
cute shoes
cooperative children
supportive husband
restful naps

He Loves Me

The husband. He cracks me up and I'll tell ya why. He really is the ultimate tech geek. He is up on all the latest in the hottest tech gadgets. And he can predict when something is going to be big. He has the gift. (For all of you who know him: can I get an "Amen"?) I never knew this when we were dating. All I can say is, Bonus!

I have always been a journal-keeper. And when I was 17 I compiled in that journal an impossible list of requirements for what I wanted in a husband. And the husband meets all of these requirements. But I didn't include tech geek on my list. Who knew that's what I wanted? And I got it! Bonus! Jackpot, even!

The husband will ask me every so often, "Hey, don't you want (insert latest tech gadget)?" And he means that he wants to buy the item for me- not us, not him- just for me. And he is serious. He wants his wife to have all these cool toys. He's a giver.

And usually I respond with, "Not really. I don't need it and don't think I would use it all that much."

And that's where the conversation ends. Until he brings it up again a few days later. And then the conversation repeats. Except after I say no, he will give me a little sales pitch on the thing and does his best to try and get me to spend a bunch of money on something I think I won't ever use.

Some of these little items include: a digital camera, laptop, cell phone, ipod, etc. And seriously, I always say no. And then after his propaganda and hard sell, I tend to get the item a few months after the idea is introduced. And he gets way excited. More excited than I ever do. And he reads the manual for me (I hate, hate, hate reading instruction manuals. Like, really hate!) and then tells me how to use it.

A couple years ago we went through this whole routine over an ipod. I didn't really want one. Didn't need one. Didn't know when I would use it. Until finally he purchased one for me for my birthday. And I enjoyed it for a month. Until I lost it in my house somewhere. And have not been able to find it ever since. But the children loved it while it was in the home. I believe they used it more than I did. But it has been lost for a long time. And the girls have little MP3 players of their own that they now listen to. And they love them.

Last week, the husband was surfing woot.com. He loves that site. And he came across these little MP3 players for a ridiculous price. And he asked me if I wanted one. And I guess I did. And so he ordered two.

They arrived in the mail yesterday. And the girls were way excited for me. And today he took them to the office with him and loaded one up with tunes for me. I listened to it this evening. And he put a sweet little song on there for me. It's a love song. One I have never heard before. It told me lots of nice things. And it brought a cute little smile to my face.

Because he loves me.

the song? 1 2 3 4 by Plain White T's-- scrolling on the side bar for a limited time ------->

A Bunch of Misc.

Just a couple of items of business to take care of this day:

Item #1
If any of you are interested in The Santa Claus Book I wrote about in December, I have found a few used copies on Amazon- starting at only $6.90! That's a bargain. Go check 'em out! You won't be disappointed. I don't think. Unless you're weird. Or unless I'm weird, I guess.

Item #2
Don't forget to purchase your copy of Something Cleverish, the blog book to support the Nielson family. My little copy is on it's way. How do I know? I was notified by email. Easy to order! Go. Do it. Like right now.

Item #3
Go check out Mormon Mommy Blogs. There is a mega-giveaway extravaganza going on as you read this and you don't wanna miss out!

Item #4
Oldest daughter is still selling those Girl Scout Cookies. Please order. And, don't worry, cause I just got an email from the Girl Scout Association assuring the world that the peanut butter used in the Tagalongs and Dosido's is not tainted with salmonella. I promise!

Item #5
This one is a little personal.

Do you have the follower gadget on your blog? Does it affect you when you notice a follower has dropped off your little tally? I have found that it does affect me. Like- I find myself thinking, "Come back! Come back! I promise I'll write something better tomorrow! Or even right now if you want me to!"

I have lost 4 followers over the last little bit. And I don't know who they are. Because I don't take notes. But I might start. Just to know.

I totally suffer from thinking that my posts get lamer the longer I blog. So, then I just think people are getting tired of the same ole stuff here.

So, here is the plan. If you wanna stop following me, just don't take your little picture off my blog, k? That way I won't have to know. And my pillow will be dry tomorrow morning. Because I pretty much cry myself to sleep at night when a follower leaves me. Really. (but not totally)



I believe that is all. But there could be more. So if I think of anything else, I may be back to add an Item #6. It could happen.

Of Raspberries, Batman and Presidents

It should be Inauguration Day every day of the year! My children, minus oldest daughter who is away to school, are still deep in dreamland. When they awake, this country will be under the direction of a new commander-in-chief.

I have enjoyed the silence in my home as I watch the events of the day unfolding on NBC. I always tune to NBC. I love the familiarity of the voice of Tom Brokaw. And I know if the children were awake, we would not be tuned to NBC, but Noggin or Disney would be rocking our day.

I am watching Dan Quayle, Walter Mondale, Al Gore. A little former VP parade. Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter, George and Barbara Bush, and Bill and Hillary Clinton make their entrance as middle daughter parades her tired self downstairs to join me on the couch.

The husband and I were in Washington, DC in June of last year and it has provided me with a reference for this day. I am amazed to see the sea of people on the mall. Almost 2 miles of people. How cool to be there this day.

I did not vote for Barack Obama, but he has my full support as President of this country. And change is good. I appreciate the service of George Bush. He is a good man. He was faced with difficult challenges. And he made tough decisions. And his popularity has suffered. But he led our country and I respect him. As I will Obama. This truly is a historic moment in our history. How far we have come. What a wonderful country we live in!

As President Obama was concluding his speech little son made his entrance- complete with a little black mask on his face. And it is good to know that whether we have a Bush president or Obama president, little son is still free to be Batman whenever he desires. I believe that is covered in the Constitution's Bill of Rights under the 35th amendment which states

"Citizens of this country shall be free to be whichever superhero they so choose and may change their superhero status at any moment, even if it be 400 times a day so long as there is a cape or mask to support said hero."

************************************

I think middle daughter summed it up best when she uttered to me, just before then President- elect Barack Obama stepped onto the steps of the Capitol to be introduced, "Mom, I wonder what raspberries feel like." Exactly.

And then there was flag-waving and cheering and whistling and applause that could be felt rippling across the country. And we have a new leader. May God bless him and God Bless the United States of America!

Where do you think I could get a hat like Aretha's?

A New Suit

Last week I told you about our little car incident. And did you remember it happened at church? So, I just want to share one more thing about that crazy incident with you. I found out from the husband just two days ago that, had the silly little window crashers checked, they would have found the back driver side passenger door unlocked. Silly window crashers.

No worries, however, the husband pounded out the door frame where a crow bar had been used to attempt the break-in and a new window has been installed. So, we're almost as good as new.

In keeping with the theme of crazy things that happen at church, I want to tell you about another unfortunate incident that occurred last April. Yes, this means a little story time. Get comfy. Or not. But if you're interested (and I think this one's pretty good), here goes...

The husband has church responsibilities that require him to be present for early morning meetings. Which means, I get to get myself and three little ones ready for church all on my own. Every Sunday. Last April I received a phone call just before leaving for church. I noticed on the caller i.d. that it was in fact the husband. I answered the phone and was greeted with,

"Don't worry, I'm still alive."

What?

The husband then proceeded to recount a life or death struggle he had experienced just minutes before he phoned. And it was this: the husband was in the ward clerk's office taking care of a few things between meetings. He was seated at the computer desk when he leaned across to get something out of a drawer to his right. No sooner had he opened the drawer than he heard the revving of a small motor and felt a tugging on his suit coat. He glanced down to realize that the corner of his coat had fed itself into the paper shredder, which was on auto-feed.

Can you picture the scene as he attempted to turn off the power on the machine? And it would not turn off. So he began tugging on his suit in an attempt to free it from the angry clutches of the runaway shredder. The shredder was not willing to surrender the fight and held tightly to his suit. The husband began to worry as he is standing, in the clerk's office, fighting a paper shredder that is traveling up his suit, literally lifting off the ground to satisfy its hungry appetite.

Eventually the husband was able to reach for the power cord and unplug the machine, but not before the thing devoured the lower corner, pocket and much of the bottom half of the suit- all the way to the lower button. Yes, it shredded the button.

And so the husband phoned to inform me that I still had a husband. Whew. Maybe I should stop sending him to church. It's costing me a lot of money.

And now he finally has a new suit. Because he got tired of wearing his sport coat to church. And he looks mighty fine in that new navy blue suit.

Like, waaaay fine.

Probably the only suit I like better is the one he got on his birthday.

And I can totally testify that near death experiences like this one really make you appreciate those you love one thousand times more than you did before they walked out the door that morning.



PS- happy Martin Luther King Day! Hopefully you have purchased all your MLK day gifts already. But, in the event that you have not- here's a great suggestion for all you last-minute shoppers. Sue has gone to great lengths to prepare it for you.

PPS- go Cardinals. Who knew?

Extra! Extra!

The book to benefit Stephanie and Christian Nielson is ready for purchase.

You should buy one.

And you can read some funny stuff by some brilliant people.

And once you have read their genius writing,

maybe you could read my little part in the book, too.

I think you will like it.

All ya gotta do is go here and purchase one for yourself for Martin Luther King day.

It will be your best MLK day gift- evah!

Teaching Moments

Actual conversation middle daughter had with the canine just 2 minutes ago:

Middle daughter had in her possession two Ariel toothbrushes. Both her own. Because Ariel is her favorite princess. She crouched down to be better able to see the canine and lifted that little hairy face with her tiny hands. As she gently cradled the canine's chin so they could see eye to eye, she said softly, "These are my toothbrushes. They brush teeth. Ariel is on them. But they are not the same. One is pink and white with sparkles and the other one is purple and pink. My favorite colors are purple and pink."

She opened her mouth and pointed to her pearly whites and said, "These are teeth."

Then she pointed to the canines chops and lovingly pointed out, "These are your teeth. They are pointy. My teeth are not pointy. I am a girl. You are a dog."

She was truly teaching the canine. And it was obvious she knew that the canine was privy to new information. And the canine was attentive. As any student should be.

I think she is going to be a great mom.

Testing, Testing

The US of A is going all-digital on February 17, 2009. Did you know? Pretty sure you may not have heard, so I took it upon myself to notify you.

Now, much of what I hear is that this is going to be a great thing- blah blah blah.

We at this house are prepared. The husband assured me we were.

Our local news stations ran the test. You know the one. Turn on your tv's and if you still get the broadcast you are set. But, if you get the message, "Your television is not good enough for the digital revolution, climb out of the stone age" or something like that, then you should get the government coupon and purchase a converter box. We got one of those coupons for our bedroom tv. And we purchased our converter box. And we turned on all the tv's in the house to participate in the broadcast test and our broadcast went un-interrupted. And we thought we were set.

But we aren't.

Apparently my silver under-the-cabinet cd/radio/tv (the tv part is just audio- it has no monitor) does not make the cut. Whaa? I listen to that thing every day! Well, at least on the days I cook. Which is most days. Cause my fam likes to chow on the tasty vittles I concoct. (I think) So most days I try to feed them. Except, everyday middle daughter says she doesn't like what I put in front of her. And she vows not to eat it. And it drives me nuts. (Especially when we stay at the in-laws for like two weeks and the mother-in-law begins to believe the children are ridiculous. Which, sometimes, they are. But not always. But I think kids turn on the ridiculous act whenever other adults are around so that their parents can be unfairly judged by other adults whose children would never act that way.)

So, this is my routine. Put on apron. Turn on utc cd/r/tv. Heat up cooking instrument. Cook whatever it is that is on the menu. Serve it up with parsley garnishes, sprinkled sugars and drizzled sauces. (And don't forget, my hair is in a glorious up-do and on my delicate feet are lovely heels.)

And as I go through this routine, I listen to the news. Because usually I start cooking around 5:00 pm which is the time the local news comes on. It is, coincidentally, also the time that the children enjoy to have a little melt-down if they feel so inclined. (Why is that? And the 5:00 melt-down is most often the mother of all melt-downs. Complete with weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth. Oh, how I love a good melt-down!)

The other evening as I was cooking, the local tv station performed their "Is Your TV Gonna Cut It?" test. I thought nothing of it. Until all I could hear was static. Static. Coming from my little silver box.

Serious.

I can't hook up a converter box to my little silver box. Defeats the purpose. What to do? Do they make these silver boxes in the digital format where I can still get tv audio? Because I am kinda used to my news while cooking now.

I don't know what the future holds for me. Keep me in your prayers. And send me a recipe middle daughter will devour as soon as it is placed in front of her. Her majesty is difficult to please, culinarily speaking.

Broken

Way back in June of '08 the husband ordered a new car. We have only 5 months left until it arrives. And it will look like this:









Not exactly sure what the husband loves about this car. But, he has been loving them since they were conceived. And so our order is in.

The husband has been waiting patiently. And so have the children. And it has been hard for them to wait patiently, because they know that this car promises to be something special. They have named it The Date Car. And they are excited, because when we get it, this is the vehicle we will use for our special one on one dates they so love.

Until The Date Car is delivered, the husband continues to drive the faithful Ford Focus. It looks like this:

Well, it did up until Sunday- sometime during church. And now it looks like this:

It went and got itself broken into. In the church parking lot!

Man, I wish that car were a little more smart and not so focused, then it wouldn't get itself into situations like this.

I think I know why the husband ordered that cute little blue thing with the silver stripe. It's smart. It can probably fight off criminals.

I am going to suggest that he do something like this to it. (you know, to scare off any bad guys)

And for those of you who may be wondering: yes, the husband does fit in this little car. With room to spare. Kind of makes me think of The Incredibles, except the husband isn't quite as filled out as Mr. Incredible nor is he a cartoon.

Thin Mint, Anyone?

Would you care for some cookies? If you are local, (Phoenix area) then we are your Girl Scout cookie hook-up. Because, wouldn't you rather buy from us than some random troop outside Safeway?

Oldest daughter is selling Girl Scout cookies. And she is way excited! She is just a Daisy Girl Scout- 5-7 yr age group- and this is the first year Daisies have been allowed to sell cookies. She has sold 20 boxes so far. She has a goal, along with her troop, to make sure that she sells 35 boxes. If each girl in her troop reaches this goal, they will skip off to Build-A-Bear to stuff a little bear for their very own. If they don't each sell 35 boxes? No bears.

Cookies are $4.00 a box and will be delivered mid-February. And money isn't due till cookies are delivered! So, if you want to place that order, let me know what cookies you would like (Samoa, Thin Mint, Lemon Chalet Cremes, Trefoils, Do-Si-Dos, Dulce de Leche, Surgar Free Chocolate Chip, and Tagalongs) and how many boxes and we will deliver those cookies in February.


Humor us, k?

Bedtime

Last evening as the husband and I were ushering the children off to bed, the husband offered piggy-back rides to anyone who was interested.

He declared that the rides would go oldest to youngest. And invited us to line up accordingly.

And then we discussed who was the oldest. That would be me. I declined a ride, not wanting to injure the husband's back. So, the first piggy-back ride went to oldest daughter. And the husband promised to return for middle daughter and then little son since he is the youngest.

When the husband offered a ride to the youngest, little son corrected the husband- setting it straight that he is not the youngest, he is the "two-est".

He is absolutely correct. Until January 26th. Because then he will be the "three-est".

Catching Up

And so a new year is underway. The husband, the children and I have returned home from a two week holiday in Utah. It was wonderful. Full of everything that is Christmas: family, friends, food, snow, gifts, time, games, tears, and travel. (Sorry I never told you we were headed to Utah- I just didn't want the neighborhood hooligans wreaking havoc on my home while we were away. You know... because I'm pretty sure they read my blog.)

For me it ended too soon. For the children it ended too soon. And for the husband, who was faced with grown-up tasks (ones that should never, ever have to happen) at the office on Monday- it ended way too soon.

So now let me point out that I incorporated the word for the day in that last paragraph. Let me explain. Growing up, my mom would often tell us, "The word for the day is (insert word)..." in an attempt to educate her little family and expand their vocabulary.

A number of Christmases ago, she presented each of my brothers and sisters and me with a small spiral-bound book entitled Plentiful Platitudes. This little treasure contains uplifting and inspiring quotations and anecdotes from various notable people. The second half of the book is filled with 365 vocabulary words- one for each day of the year- complete with definitions and sample sentences. My loving mother took the time to sit at her computer and type out this entire manual- and search out every quote and word for the day. And we all appreciate it.

And the word for the day, January 6, is:

epistrophe (i-PIS-truh-fee) noun

The repetition of a word or phrase at the end of successive clauses or sentences.

[From Greek epistrophe, from epi- (upon) + strophe (turning).]

the ending of phrases with the same term.

"If women are healthy and educated, their families will flourish. If women are free from violence, their families will flourish. If women have a chance to work... their families will flourish."

And so you will note that I incorporated the word for the day by repeating the phrase ended too soon in the aforementioned paragraph. Go me! Right, Mom?

Anyway, Mom, yes- I still read from Plentiful Platitudes. And it still helps me. And I think I am smarter because you took the time to do this for us. Props.

Perhaps I will be able to recap my Christmas holiday at a later time, but for now, I just want to offer a huge Thank You to my parents, who this year, surpassed any gift they have ever given to us children before. And I can't wait to receive volume 2 for Christmas 2009. My parents gave us each another spiral-bound book. But this time it contains their life histories leading up to the day they met. And a promise of "To Be Continued..." (Mom and Dad, you know we are holding you to that, right?)

It was a gift that brought tears to my eyes as the husband opened it and read the preface. It is gold to me. And I am thankful they took the time to sit and type out their histories in their own words, with their own personalities reflected on paper.

I stayed up late Christmas night devouring it. Many of the stories I have heard before- and I was surprised to discover many stories that were unfamiliar. And when the children awoke the next morning I shared some of my favorite tidbits with them. And the children have loved discovering that their grandparents were once young and shared some of their same interests.
It is a gift that has given me pause to consider the history I am writing daily. I have a chance to determine today what I will write as history in the future. And so, as I recall the goals the husband and I discussed on our journey home from Utah, I realize that

2009 is Mine!
(this is my theme for the year- thought up on the spot.
I think it's pretty good.)

It is mine to do with what I will. Mine to determine the type of mother I will be, the type of friend, the type of daughter, the type of servant, the type of wife.

I want to be a mother who is a success, a friend who is a success, a daughter who is a success, a servant who is a success, a wife who is a success.

I think I just had an epistrophe.