Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Ten Things I've Learned From Owning a Smart Car
10. Owning a Smart Car hasn't necessarily made me any smarter, but getting 40 miles to the gallon is very satisfying. I am happy. Does your car get that? Neener-neener-neener...
9. Everyone stares at Smart Cars and the people that are in them. Privacy is a thing of the past. So much for nosepicking in the car - good thing I drive the van a few times a week!
8. Cars ARE fun to drive. They aren't just tools. I can actually come home unstressed from the commute. Now if I could just leave the stress of work at work...
7. People stop laughing once they sit in a Smart Car. But they never stop laughing at someone who is 6'6'' standing by one.
6. People actually still wave, smile and even talk to strangers if they think you have something in common. Either there are a lot of closet Smart Car owners, or adults still collect Hot Wheels. How else could you explain how much I have in common with these people just because I have a cool little teeny-tiny car?
5. Going places now takes extra time as I have to plan to answer the same five questions each time I get in or get out of the car. However, I never have to worry about forgetting where I park in a parking lot. I can simply look for the gathered group of people staring in my car windows.
4. Drivers of big trucks, lowriders and sports cars feel that they have something to prove or are compensating for something...ummm...like gas mileage. They can't stay behind me, even if I am going 80 mph. It is simply amazing how many people have to rev up and speed past me between lights, just for me to pull up next to them. They then make themselves feel better by rolling down their window to ask me if my "car is powered by squirrels."
3. Believe it or not, women are more likely to ask about cars than men. I guess cars are chick magnets. Sorry ladies, I already found the woman of my dreams.
2. Being seen with my lovely wife in our "date car" is awesome. Woot-wooo. What a babe! (The wife, not the car.)
1. "Death trap" is much manlier sounding than "clown car."