Sunday, August 17, 2008

Item #1

Ahem. Ahem! AHEM!!

Can I have your attention please? I have a couple matters of business to address.

First of all, I have an in-grown toenail (the second toe on my left foot) and I don’t feel that I have received proper sympathy from those who are already aware of the situation. So, I am opening it to a broader audience and I am begging for your compassion on this issue.

I know that many of you have had an in-grown toenail and many of you have not. For those of you who have, you know the pain and agony that I am enduring. And for those of you who have not, I am sure you can understand when I tell you that this is excruciating to bear. My only prayer is that you never have to endure such a wound. But, I in the event that you do, I want to convey to you that if you come to me and share your burden, I WILL BE THERE FOR YOU! I will give you the proper amount of sympathy and understanding. I will find you an open-toe shoe that would be appropriate for the toe that is experiencing the ache, and I will let you talk about it until you feel you have sufficiently expressed your burden.

Mine was the sleep of the bitterly disturbed last night. Impossible it was to find a sleeping position that would benefit the toe. What I think the problem is would be this: a couple years ago I broke my toe- the third one on my left foot. (Although the doctor said it was just a contusion:
con·tu·sion (plural con·tu·sions) n
bruise: an injury to the body in which skin and bone are not broken but damage is done to tissues under the skin, causing a bruise

I never agreed with that diagnosis) When I had this "contusion" I completely babied that toe. I was extra careful with it, splinted it up, and made sure that it didn't have to work too hard when I walked. Understandably, the other toes had to pick up the slack.

So, I personally believe that my second toe is making an attempt at gaining an equal amount of attention as third toe. Let me tell you, it is working. I have given it mounds of attention. I have focused on it every step of the way.

I do know that this will repair itself and my life will return to semi-abnormal, however, in the meantime- just know that I am suffering.

I am sorry, that is all the time we have. This meeting will stand adjourned. We will take a short recess and reconvene tomorrow morning to discuss Item #2.

Please be prompt, as latecomers will not be admitted.


Chris said...

Ummm, I never recieved the Outlook invite for this meeting, so I will be unable to attend the meeting tomorrow, as I have a calendar conflict.

Will there be a make-out, I mean make-up session?

uniquelynat said...

well i don't see how chris could expect such attention if he can't even be bothered to make the meeting in the first place. I, of course, will be here promptly. And in the case of an emergency i will send #1 fan in my place.

sorry about your toe...i have never had one on any other toe than my big toes. i don't know how it feels on the lesser toes....probably crowded. hope you recover soon!!!

mom and dad said...

OUCH! I know how they feel and it is not pleasant. You have my sympathy, e.t.,(1) sameness of feeling, (2) mutual liking or understanding (3) pity or compassion for another's trouble or suffering. I have heard that if you put a small piece of cott under the afflicted nail it should ease the pain. Good luck with it.
I will be at the next meeting.
With best

Sarah said...

I haven't ever had an ingrown toenail, but I did get to go to the doctor with Aaron one time and watch them numb it up and cut it out. Super cool and totally gross at the same time. My thoughts are with you and your family at this time of difficulty. Good meeting. I once heard that the thirteenth article of faith was, "We believe in meetings..."

trublubyu said...

Chris- no make-out or up sessions. please bring me your note.

nat- thank you for being so responsible, especially enough to think about having #1 fan come in your place. and yes, my toes are crowded. than you for your concern.

mom- thank you for your sympathy. i can always count on you.

sarah- the husband also had to have one cut out. ick.
yes, we believe in meetings, meetings for meetings, and meetings within meetings. indeed we may say we cover all bases.

Mechelle said...

Awesome! sorry I missed the meeting, If there is anything I can know if you need to go to the doctor or something, I can watch your kiddls