The Miracle of the Sabbath

The weatherman has forecasted a high temperature of only 85 degrees and a chance of rain on Sunday, therefore, we shall read from the B of M (Book of Meteoroligist) to see just what the prophecy contains:


1. And it came to pass that on the first day of the tenth month of the eighth year of the reign of the Dubya, that a prophecy was made throughout the land. And the greater part of the people marveled and said: How shall we know that such a thing will come to pass? Show us a sign and we will know of a surety that these things are true.

2. And the lesser part of the people, believing in the words of the prophecy, rejoiced and cried with one voice saying: We shall welcome this day and glory in the words of the prophet for we know that all things will work together for our good.

3. And the people listened as the prophet declared that on the Sabbath the miracle should come to pass.

4. But I and my house were not prepared and we did wonder at the words which were spoken. Therefore we did recall the days of our existence, even those that were in the third month of the eighth year of the reign of the Dubya, insomuch that we did go to our closets and make ready our raiment that we might find ourselves blameless at the coming of the signs.

5. And those of the house of my family did again hear the words of the prophet, for they were repeated at five, six and ten. For he did declare that the people should prepare themselves. He admonished them to go with soberness on the coming Sabbath and have joy in the cooler temperatures, even a temperature of five and eighty, the likes of which had not been seen in all the land for a space of many months. And he did also declare that the people might receive moisture, even in the form of water falling to the earth from the heavens.

6. Now the more part of the lesser part of the people did wonder at the news, for on the first day of the tenth month the temperature had risen to two and one hundred, and they did marvel that the land might cool and provide comfort for them and their families. And behold, they did make plans to go out and glory in the day.

7. But I and my family did covenant to keep the Sabbath Day holy and refrain from making merry that we might be blessed above all others.

8. Now behold, the people look forward with steadfastness to the Sabbath with great wonder and do search the heavens for the signs which the prophet hath testified shall come unto the people on this day.

9. And thus we see, that the righteousness of the people doth bring about great and marvelous things pertaining to their happiness. For when a people doth endure a summer with soberness and long suffering, blessings are poured out upon their heads; insomuch as there is not room to receive it.







*concept inspired by a post here