Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Just So You Know

If you open your refrigerator and it is really smelly (I'm talkin' P to the Yew!), it could be the furry rice that has spent a good portion of last month chillin' on the top shelf. You should remove it from the fridge. Chances are, there are additional unidentifiable items at the way back.

If you decide to wash the container the rice is in instead of throwing it away, which was your first instinct, you should take a few precautions. If you decide to dispose of the fuzzy rice down the garbage disposal, it would be nice if you had a plunger just for your kitchen, because it is possible that the rice may perhaps probably clog up your disposal. If you don't have a plunger specifically designated for kitchen use only, you will have to use your bathroom plunger, and a gallon or more of bleach. Because you are going to gross out just thinking about it afterwards.

And when you flip the switch to the insinkerator (that's what mine says on it, does yours?) you will be mesmerized by the gentle swirling motion of the water and bits of rice and the slurping sound of a non-functioning insinkerator. And then you will snap back to reality and notice that nothing is draining. This is when you will have to grab your bathroom plunger. And do your best not to think of where it has been. And you will be way bummed that you are babysitting someone's kids. So you can't run to the store and get a new, clean plunger- designated for kitchen use only. Be sure to block out a half hour of your day, have your secretary hold your calls and wear a sweat band. And you will close your eyes and start plunging. Like you never plunged before. And then, probably most importantly,
don't forget to cover up this little thing






because once you start plunging, all that chopped up fuzzy rice will come spewing right out at ya. After a few plunges you will get a brain and realize you could avoid all the spray. This is when you will put your big blue mixing bowl in front of it in order to divert the icky sludge. Be sure to plunge long and hard. And when your biceps are burning, don't forget to spend a few minutes working on the drain on the other side of the sink. You'll have to remove the bowl so that the plunger can work undisturbed, but that's ok because this side doesn't spit back.

And then you will turn on your garbage disposal and everything will drain beautifully. And you will want to do a herkie, right there in your kitchen, so that your fridge and oven can witness your awesomeness. And you will feel triumphant because you didn't have to call the husband or a plumber. And that's when you break out the bleach and then write "kitchen plunger" on your shopping list.

P.S. Tomorrow I shall post the donut recipe. Yum!

14 comments:

Shorty said...

Ahhh yes, my dear! Your sink looks very similar to mine, and I've had just such a rice dilemma. You are lucky the plunger worked for you...I had to unscrew the pvc pipes to scoop out the rice. I think I tried to dump about six or eight servings down there... Anyhoo...the plastic pipes that I always thought were the builder's cheap way of installing my plumbing (instead of using metal) turned out to be quite the blessing since they were easy to take apart and reassemble. I guess the moral of the story for both of us is....just dump rice in the garbage. Every time.

Trying to Stay Calm! said...

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*MARY* said...

We just fry our old fuzzy rice with eggs and spam.

Mechelle said...

Ewwwwe!!!! You are so brave. I dump everything that doesn't have liquid in it in the garbage. Fourtunately we learn from our mistakes, and unfoutunately we all tend to leave leftovers in the fridge way too long.

Kellie Buckner said...

Gross to the rice. YUM to the donut recipe which I am hungrily looking forward to!

Simply Stamps said...

I love those Science projects, don't you?

Elizabeth said...

I personally just throw anything with any fuzz in the garbage. I have gone through quite a bit of rubbermaid, and I know this is wasteful, but I don't do fuzz!!!!
Glad you got your situation all figured out without the husband's help- You are WOMAN hear your ROAR!

Elizabeth said...

p.s. thanks for the photo publishing advice- I am going to try it on my next post:)

Heidi said...

WoW! I've done that with noodles and thank goodness it was a preschool day so that Micah could save me. It was a twist of a few pipes and a bucket to fix it. So you are VERY lucky that even tho it was yucky (love the furry adjecTIVE)you could still get yours goin DOWN'! Way to be the woman!! You are awesome! Caps are Meg... You must've been wearin your cape:)

Me said...

Hilarious!! That will teach you to leave fuzzy rice in the fridge!

Sarah said...

Nice work, you rock! I totally laughed out loud about the thingy spraying at you. What is that thingy called anyway?

Shannon said...

Sounds like you had a most enjoyable day! Greg's family didn't have a garbage disposal growing up and they used to just flush fun stuff like that right down the toilet. That thought never occurred to me before we were married and found ourselves disposer-less. It feels weird to pour something in there, but it does go down pretty well!

Ginny said...

whats a herkie?

Marivic_Little GrumpyAngel said...

You're funny :-) Well, I could have told you that about the rice. Asian girl here eats rice all the time and learned pretty early in life you don't put rice down the sink. But keep eating rice, because as you noticed it expands when wet, and that's what happens inside your belly and that makes you feel full and stop eating and thus a perfect weight loss diet. Not that I'm saying you need a diet since I've not seen you in person. Okay, awkward... this comment doesn't have anything to do with your plumbing problem. Sorry :-) I just thought I'd say something nice about rice after it messed up your plumbing.