Hot and Broken

Yesterday I watched my little sister's darling baby. The girls were ecstatic when they got home from school and found her at our house. We were entertained with her jabbering and by her abundant thighs.

My sister came to collect her just before dinner and we talked them into staying to dine with us on pork chops and sweet potatoes.

The husband hasn't shaved his beard all week. Just for me. Cause I like him rugged. And he asked my sister's opinion during dinner. She told him she thinks he's hot. HOT.

After dinner we went outside to ride bikes. It was a beautiful evening, not too hot- with a full moon. And bats. We had bats flying around us. The husband promised to protect us by swatting them away with the light saber he borrowed from his son. We felt safe.

As my sister and I were talking about putting our wagon in the trunk of her car, the husband was bringing in the bikes. He started with little son's razor scooter. And I think he was working on some gnarly scooter moves to impress us. Because that's what boys do when they have two hot mom chicks standing in their driveway.

Pretty soon we heard metal clanking against concrete. And we looked over and realized the husband was sprawled on his back on the driveway. And we went to see what happened.

Apparently, while practicing his gnarly moves, the wheel of the scooter hit the seam of the concrete and it tripped the scooter and the husband went down. Hard.

He told me later that as he was falling his main thought was, "My phone's in my pocket. I better roll." And roll he did. And the phone was protected.

That poor husband. His neck is hurting him today. And his feet are all scabbed up. And his pinky toe is black and blue and swollen and broken. Broken. Because, there's not a lot of protection in a pair of flip flops.

Even with a broken toe and neck pain, he still managed to do his morning routine. That man is amazing.

Razor scooters weren't made for grown men to impress mom chicks. Anyway, he should know he doesn't need to impress me. He's got me wrapped around his little finger.

And my little sister? Well, she thinks he's hot.